One of the hardest things for me during our recent monthlong stay in our neighborhood in Istanbul was that people didn't much say hi to each other or even make eye-contact. It's not that their way was wrong -- just different! -- but as a guy who likes to be friendly and neighborly it actually got wearing...
I'm such a sap—the Amica ad brought tears to my eyes!
There are so many ways to live a contactless life, and maybe every now and then there's a good reason for it, but I feel like there is so much more joy to be had in participating with people in small ways (like accepting a package from a delivery person or having a nice exchange with someone at the register). It's those little things that build a better experience for people in our communities, and it costs us nothing to say hello and be friendly. It's possible that a two-second exchange of pleasantries could be the moment that makes someone else's day!
If I get self-absorbed and fail to lift my hand in a wave or shaka because I did not notice who was in the vehicle headed the other way, I am sure to get asked at the post office or grocery store what they did to upset me!
We've been fortunate to have very good neighbours everywhere we've lived, including when we lived in an isolated rural place in Maine for 8 years. Also: I love grocery store cashierless checkout (the only place we encounter it in our lives, not living anywhere near box stores) and apparently so do many others around here in NH because there's often a line waiting for one of the 8 or 10 self-checkouts while the lanes with employee cashiers are empty.
Some people prefer less scrutiny of rather personal purchases. Or, if they are using food stamps for an occasional treat. Or buying a OTC pregnancy or drug test.
With the enforced violations of the most private privacy standards in some states, people need to be thinking afresh about what kind of scrutiny and paper trails they are leaving for meddling women haters to use against them.
This is a phenomenal article. So much truth! I live in a rural area. Our neighbor of over 50 years recently passed away. Now realtors are showing his ranch daily, to a bunch of people who seem to be “investors”, not looking for a home but rather a profit. Not one of them has bothered to wave back at us when we are sitting on our front porch, if they even bother to look out their truck window. So sad.
Two homes for sale on the tiny one-lane road to my house. Will they be people we add to the neighborhood group text for when the power or water is out or someone needs an extra pair of hands for a project? Or will they be second (third fourth) home folks who more than likely arenʻt here to care?
Kelton, thank you. I had been impaled on the horns of my own dilemma, "Should I be nice to my new neighbor and share some important information since she seemed less than neighborly at our first meeting?" Your post reminded me that its not about her, it's about me and who I want to be. Do I want to be a hermit or a good neighbor? Now I know her name and she is more friendly after I related my info. Yay! On the other topic, take all the help you can get, specifically tell them what you need, or just want...dinner, cookies, firewood, 5 minutes alone...etc because many, myself included, say "What can I do?" and you, beset by the impending little sucker of all your attention that you will soon be raising, will not know what you need. Say it out loud. Get used to saying it out loud. You will reward them by letting them be a good neighbor. peace, Gray
that amica ad!!! wow. i can’t tell you how often i am late to things because i stop and chat with my neighbors. it is worth it every time. i’m moving in with my partner at the end of the year and while he is similarly friendly and neighborly, it’s definitely not the same where he lives. we have a group text, lol (mostly for impromptu gatherings, package stuff, announcements, etc).
I'm glad they pulled that Apple ad. It struck me as so ... brutal. They could've made the same point in a much different way. Imagine the device portrayed as a magical portal that opens up to a bigger world, or something like that. Instead, they went with this violent image of wanton destruction. It gave me the creeps.
I refuse to do self-checkout when I'm on my own in a store. I just refuse to do for free a job that they would otherwise have to pay an employee to do. My husband loves self-checkout and when we are in a store together, he'll opt for that ... and ever since the debacle where my trying to bag an item led to endless "Unexpected item in bagging area!" alerts, I stand back and let him do the whole process.
As for AI in dating, all I can say is Thank God I'm not in the dating pool!
Sometimes gossip is important! Just to know who to keep away from the children… It’s a sad fact that not everyone in a tiny town is assumed safe. Extended family members are now in that loop in their tiny town, and I am grateful for those who spoke up. Takes a village, right? We all know the abysmal rate of ‘consequences’ for those who are unsafe.
One of the hardest things for me during our recent monthlong stay in our neighborhood in Istanbul was that people didn't much say hi to each other or even make eye-contact. It's not that their way was wrong -- just different! -- but as a guy who likes to be friendly and neighborly it actually got wearing...
I'm such a sap—the Amica ad brought tears to my eyes!
There are so many ways to live a contactless life, and maybe every now and then there's a good reason for it, but I feel like there is so much more joy to be had in participating with people in small ways (like accepting a package from a delivery person or having a nice exchange with someone at the register). It's those little things that build a better experience for people in our communities, and it costs us nothing to say hello and be friendly. It's possible that a two-second exchange of pleasantries could be the moment that makes someone else's day!
Agree. Humanizes everyone.
If I get self-absorbed and fail to lift my hand in a wave or shaka because I did not notice who was in the vehicle headed the other way, I am sure to get asked at the post office or grocery store what they did to upset me!
Lol now that's truly small
At least they recognize me!
😂 yes!!
Perfect timing to hear that the town talk is that you ARE good neighbors/people. Authentic and respectful - walking the walk of community -
We've been fortunate to have very good neighbours everywhere we've lived, including when we lived in an isolated rural place in Maine for 8 years. Also: I love grocery store cashierless checkout (the only place we encounter it in our lives, not living anywhere near box stores) and apparently so do many others around here in NH because there's often a line waiting for one of the 8 or 10 self-checkouts while the lanes with employee cashiers are empty.
Some people prefer less scrutiny of rather personal purchases. Or, if they are using food stamps for an occasional treat. Or buying a OTC pregnancy or drug test.
With the enforced violations of the most private privacy standards in some states, people need to be thinking afresh about what kind of scrutiny and paper trails they are leaving for meddling women haters to use against them.
It’s all good… until it isn’t.
Fair point!
How funny!
This is a phenomenal article. So much truth! I live in a rural area. Our neighbor of over 50 years recently passed away. Now realtors are showing his ranch daily, to a bunch of people who seem to be “investors”, not looking for a home but rather a profit. Not one of them has bothered to wave back at us when we are sitting on our front porch, if they even bother to look out their truck window. So sad.
You'll wear 'em down!
Two homes for sale on the tiny one-lane road to my house. Will they be people we add to the neighborhood group text for when the power or water is out or someone needs an extra pair of hands for a project? Or will they be second (third fourth) home folks who more than likely arenʻt here to care?
Kelton, thank you. I had been impaled on the horns of my own dilemma, "Should I be nice to my new neighbor and share some important information since she seemed less than neighborly at our first meeting?" Your post reminded me that its not about her, it's about me and who I want to be. Do I want to be a hermit or a good neighbor? Now I know her name and she is more friendly after I related my info. Yay! On the other topic, take all the help you can get, specifically tell them what you need, or just want...dinner, cookies, firewood, 5 minutes alone...etc because many, myself included, say "What can I do?" and you, beset by the impending little sucker of all your attention that you will soon be raising, will not know what you need. Say it out loud. Get used to saying it out loud. You will reward them by letting them be a good neighbor. peace, Gray
that amica ad!!! wow. i can’t tell you how often i am late to things because i stop and chat with my neighbors. it is worth it every time. i’m moving in with my partner at the end of the year and while he is similarly friendly and neighborly, it’s definitely not the same where he lives. we have a group text, lol (mostly for impromptu gatherings, package stuff, announcements, etc).
I'm glad they pulled that Apple ad. It struck me as so ... brutal. They could've made the same point in a much different way. Imagine the device portrayed as a magical portal that opens up to a bigger world, or something like that. Instead, they went with this violent image of wanton destruction. It gave me the creeps.
I refuse to do self-checkout when I'm on my own in a store. I just refuse to do for free a job that they would otherwise have to pay an employee to do. My husband loves self-checkout and when we are in a store together, he'll opt for that ... and ever since the debacle where my trying to bag an item led to endless "Unexpected item in bagging area!" alerts, I stand back and let him do the whole process.
As for AI in dating, all I can say is Thank God I'm not in the dating pool!
"I just refuse to do for free a job that they would otherwise have to pay an employee to do" YES!!
Sometimes gossip is important! Just to know who to keep away from the children… It’s a sad fact that not everyone in a tiny town is assumed safe. Extended family members are now in that loop in their tiny town, and I am grateful for those who spoke up. Takes a village, right? We all know the abysmal rate of ‘consequences’ for those who are unsafe.
OK back to glorious spring now!!